About Me

Welcome to the my little corner of the internet.  Here you’ll find exactly what you’re looking for: idiocy!

My goal is to fill this blog with things I love in this short life….namely running, bikes, triathlons, books, food, and a little social commentary. I promise to partially offend and never please all the people all the time.


I was born on a mayonnaise farm in the middle of Indiana.  As the youngest and only boy in a family of sixteen girls, I learned to wear makeup at an early age. I was homeschooled and didn’t meet another male until the age of 16.  After the beating, I soon realized that boys probably shouldn’t wear makeup.  So I took off my mascara and threw away my bra and started on the journey to become the man I am today.

I attended college at the University of Nebraska where I majored in the social structure of farm animals, specializing in the mating rituals of sheep outside their own species.  Nebraska was a mecca for my discipline.

Upon graduation, I moved to Oklahoma where I started working on a bovine sperm donor farm.  When the farm’s website needed an overhaul, I was asked to take on the project.  Spending all day on the internet, I developed an affinity for navel lint.  To make a long story short, here we are.

WARNING:  Don’t linger too long on this website.  I take no responsibility for the loss of IQ points from over-exposure.

Me and my life partner.